EPISODE 1 - REALITY TV IN SPORTS

So it's a shame, but it's an exciting time in sports right now.   Why is it a shame that it's exciting you ask?  For the same reason that most of us watch these reality shows.  It's exciting for stupid reasons.  Sometimes I want to throw up cause I hate "For the Love of Ray-J" or "Candy Girls" or some of the old reality shows I watched like "Flavor of Love" etc.  You know the drill.  But I just can't turn away!!!! 

Let's start in basketball.  How exciting is the Rockets vs. Lakers series?   Yeah it's good cause it's tied 1-1 right now.  Yeah, that's great (yawn).  But the reality is we are intrigued because of the bad blood.  Derek Fisher, a guy who I once was a teammate with, a guy with a pristine image in the league, President of the NBA Player's Association, tries to "Mack Truck" Louis Scola.  And let me tell you, Scola's no punk.  I played against him over in Italy in 2002 when he was playing for Scavolini Pesaro.   Fisher gets one game, which I think is appropriate.  I agree with trying to get over screens (I hate guys at the gym who just run into the screen and say "Hey call out the screens."  You see the damn screen!  Get around it) but what Fish did was crazy!  But I loved it!  Just a little more tactful next time D-Fish!  See ya Game 4. 

And how can one not be excited by the Kobe vs. Ron Artest saga.  I played against Kobe "Bean" Bryant in a practice a lot in my championship run with the Lake Show.  And yes Bean, Black Mamba, whatever you want to call him likes to mix it up sometimes.  An elbow here, an elbow there, next thing you know we were pushing and shoving each other in practice.  I was a scrub with the Lakers, but no punk.   Nine years later I see my man up to his old tricks.  But hey you don't mess with Ron Artest right?  "Don't you know you hitting Ron Artest?"  This is classic stuff!  Not sure you want to mess with Artest.  I think this is the calm before the storm right here.  http://ballhype.com/video/ron_artest_postgame_interview_on_getting_tossed_part_1/

And oh yeah, I still chuckle every time I see Rafer Alston slap Eddie House on his head like a father does a son after he acts up.  To quote my wife,  "That slap was almost as bad as mushing someone in the face."  Doesn't do much damage but it's definitely a disrespect thing.  (See the definition of mushing at the end of the blog)  But hey, "That's what happens when you start bussin' somebody ass." 

http://ballhype.com/video/eddie_house_on_rafer_alston_that_s_what_happens_when/

And that my friends may be the most truthful line ever spoken in a sports interview.  So many times I just wanted to slap the shit outta someone for draining shot after shot on me.   I love Skip, but that was dumb.  He's never been the most level headed player.  Saw him many times in the East Orange, NJ summer league lose his cool.  Talking a lot of smack in the wrong hood. Did I just say smack? 

Lost in all this extra curricular activity is Shane Battier.  I still hate him!  It's not his fault.  Just those nerdy Duke fans.  "Who's your daddy? Battier!  Who's your daddy? Battier!"   That may have been the most annoying chant of all time.   I watched Battier yesterday on "Pardon the Interruption", one of my favorite shows on television after "For the Love of Ray J."  And Battier said all the "right" things when speaking of stopping Kobe.  "I just want to make him work."  He also said "I've taken all the emotion out of the game when I'm guarding him."   He's right about that!  His face look dumbfounded when Kobe dropped 40 on him.  He was expressionless.    So Shane "Who's your Daddy?" Battier probably won't stop Kobe, but who can?  Besides, Kobe doesn't like being anybody's son or little brother, ask Shaq Diesel.   But the one thing is that Battier was there on every shot.  It was great defense, just better offense by The Black Mamba.   Battier really earned my respect even though Kobe dropped the 40 ounce on him.  But don't tell me that you didn't want to "Eddie House" him Battier!  Don't play that cool stuff with me. Not even once did you think about "Eddie Housing him?"  Even after he was defecating all over you!!  By the way "Eddie House" is the the new word for slap a chump.  If you use "Eddie Housing" that is the present tense.  

So you wanna talk about the Cleveland vs. Atlanta series?  Why?  It's over already!  Hawks are banged up and Lebron is toying with cats, swinging his arms, dancing in front of the camera.  It's so "Chris Rock" out there.  It's a joke!   Just have to wonder how the Cavs will respond if they get tested?  Everyone else is in a slug fest and the Cavs are just cruising.   Lebron said yesterday "I'm having fun."  True and I like it.  But what happens when the all jokes stop and the audience, like say Boston or Orlando, isn't so friendly anymore?  Hmmmmmmmmm.

So another cheater in baseball.  Now it's Manny Ramirez.  Who cares?  He's out 50 games.   What do you expect from the sport that has been the biggest fraud maybe of all time?  Hey what do you expect from big overweight guys who barely have to stay in shape to play the game?

Guys who get hurt sliding into a base or running to third base too hard and pull a hamstring. Come on man, get the hell outta here!  Did you really think they were actually gonna work for it?  "Everyone else is doing it."  Enough said, can't waste my blog on this.  To me 50 games is just an "Eddie House" on the wrist!  And I'm out.

Mush -  A hard push with an open hand anywhere in the head area.  Can be in the face, side of the head or back of the head.  A tactic used to embarrass the individual.  Less violent than a slap but worse than a push.  The tactic is used more frequently in the hood than in the suburbs.